Encounter: Jay L. Garfield

“Nobody– not you, not me, not the person you love most, not the person you most detest– is…the center of the universe. And to the degree that you treat even somebody you love as the center of the universe, you’re distorting them, you’re distorting reality, you’re setting up unrealistic expectations…. Much of what causes us suffering isn’t always callousness.  It’s sometimes caring too much about things or even caring too much about people– caring so much that we distort their reality, put them on a pedestal and assume they are going to be as they are permanently.” Professor Jay L. Garfield in a lecture on the Daodejing.